In the depths of her despair, Esmeralda turned to the compassionate embrace of the Society of St. Vincent de Paul Southwest Texas. Life had dealt her a crushing blow - the loss of her beloved husband left her with the immense responsibility of raising her two grandchildren all alone. Struggling to keep her home, she felt overwhelmed by the weight of her financial burdens.

With a heavy heart, she reached out to the Society, searching for a glimmer of hope. With deep gratitude, Esmeralda found relief as the Society covered her April rent and graciously contributed towards May's expenses.

Yet, it didn't end there. St. Gregory's Conference, filled with unwavering kindness, stepped forward to bridge the remaining gap, proving to her that compassion knows no bounds. It was an overwhelming blessing that touched her soul. But life's trials did not relent for Esmeralda. Grieving the loss of her husband, the mounting financial pressures and the challenges of raising her grandchildren took a toll on her health. An unexpected hospitalization forced her to leave her job, adding further strain to her already fragile situation.

However, hope persisted, fueled by the love and support she received from the Society of St. Vincent de Paul.

With their encouragement, she persevered and embarked on a journey to rebuild her life. Recently, she secured a job at a call center, which became her lifeline to stability. Slowly but surely, she started reclaiming her financial independence, inching her way back to solid ground.

When Esmeralda reached out to express her gratitude, her voice carried the weight of immense appreciation.

About five years ago, Ms. Penny Sue arrived in San Antonio.     On the bus ride from Vermont, her home state, she contemplated all the events that led her to Texas. 

Decades of bad choices and a series of violent relationships had not only damaged her but also her relationship with her now adult children.  All relationships seemed difficult. Intrusive thoughts, images, and distress brought on by the violence she had experienced in her life kept her wanting to constantly move. The familiarity of battered women’s shelters was adding to her discouragement. She feared stillness. She kept fleeing from anything that would trigger her trauma. 

“I was a broken woman." Penny Sue said. "But I kept thinking, ‘There has to be more to this life.’ ”

The fact that she was heading to Haven for Hope in San Antonio, Texas was a huge undertaking for Penny Sue.  There was opportunity there but could she commit to all that was required? Could she work through her pain, trauma, and fear?

“I am not going to lie,” Penny Sue stated with resonance, “at that point, I kept telling myself, ‘If this doesn’t work, my back up plan is the Greyhound!’ ”

Her healing process at Haven was not quick.  It took her several times going in and out of Prospect’s Courtyard before she made the decision to reside on the campus.

“I worked through all that”, recalled Penny Sue as she described the various stages of PTSD that she had to overcome. “My main reason for doing the work was to reunite with my children. I knew that I had caused them pain because of my life choices. I knew that to be a better mother and to be there as a grandmother to my grandchildren, I had to stop running and do the work.”

Change was not going to happen overnight.  Penny Sue knew that what she was committing to was a lifelong process. But she felt something she hadn’t in a very long time, the desire to reclaim her reason and purpose.  

Once she had done the work of gaining emotional stability, Penny Sue secured meaningful employment.  She now had regained her strength, but there was another obstacle to overcome. She needed to transition out of homelessness and into a place she could call her own. That is when the Society of St. Vincent de Paul stepped in and began working with Penny Sue to empower her and provide the resources she needed.

“Haven brought me out of feeling like I was not worthy. The Society of St. Vincent de Paul gave me strength to move on and start a new life.”

While working with the Society of St. Vincent de Paul, Penny Sue learned that her job allowed her the opportunity to have her own apartment and provide for herself. 

“I felt connected to the staff. Our talks were genuine, and their hearts were so full. They give a person their presence. Their voice, the way they talk to you, gives you a feeling of hope. You feel their heart.”

Penny Sue recalled a meeting she had with staff regarding her finances. She remembers her nervousness and her fear because she didn’t know how, or if , everything was going to work. 

“My mind was all over the place! How am I going to pay my bills? Do I have enough to live on my own?” she recalled with tears in her voice. “But as we worked on the budget, I began to feel calm because they were so positive. It was a holy moment. ‘You are going to make it. In black and white, this is what you are going to do,’ SVdP told me. They put a stamp on my future. I needed that extra reassurance.” 

Penny Sue has been living in her new home for months now.  The Society of St. Vincent de Paul found her a safe, living space minutes from where she works. “My daughter is so proud of me.” Penny Sue says when she thinks about her new accomplishments. 

As we spoke of her journey, we both filled with tear of joy. She came to the realization that even though the last chapter of her life was long, hard, and heartbreaking, this was a new chapter and new beginning. 

“To be honest with you, I have been on the go for five years now. I was alone then but constantly moving. My spirit wanted to fill the huge void I felt from years of torment and bad decisions. I did not let myself be alone with my thoughts., Penny Sue said. “Now, I am still alone. And being in an apartment alone can be hard. To be grounded is hard. But I told myself I was going to do the work. And for the first time in my life, I had the support to be able to change my life. This is good for my children to see this. To prove to them, I am not the same woman I used to be.”

It was wonderful speaking to Ms. Penny Sue and hearing about her hardships and new blessings.  We spoke of new hardships like owning a pet and managing the free time she now has on her hands.  We also spoke of adding plants to her apartment, going to church, and the reality that some things are still hard to manage. 

“I still feel a void at times,” Penny Sue stated, her tone softening with sadness. “My spirit still wants to fill that void. But now, I fill it with healthier things. I have beautiful grand babies that need to see me at my best. I think of them when I make choices now.”  

Her advice to anyone who has been in her shoes is this, “Your life will flash by one way or the other. But if you need support, it is there. There is hope for better but you have to work for it.”

To Penny Sue, the help that the Society of St. Vincent de PauI gave her was one of compassion, support, and empowerment. “I never had so much support. It gave me the will to live. Not just survive but to experience all the beauty that comes with living.”

On behalf of the Society of St. Vincent de Paul, Southwest Council and all those that support our efforts, we wish Penny Sue continued blessings. 

-Interviewed by Erica Benavides, Director of Development

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